Blog Posts

I miss books…

Following on from my post yesterday about my ‘To Do’ list, I found my daughter’s own job list in her pre-school bookbag.

image

And quite frankly, I want to swap lists. Hers looks so much easier. 😂😂

But seriously..her list is a good example of what I often ‘see’ when I try to focus on reading ANYTHING. Just a load of bleurgh on the page.

It is a problem which I have struggled with for some time now, and I am in no doubt is very common. Brain Fog is one way I describe it. An inability to focus or concentrate on anything written for a period of time. And a difficulty retaining that information.

I have always been a bit of a fast reader, even when young. But I used to LOVE books. I would get lost in them. I particularly liked reading fantasy or sci-fi or anything that took me away from this world. Our table names at our wedding were of places from the Lord of the Rings novels. I still have my childhood set of The Chronicles of Narnia. In my twenties I loved reading historical fiction.

But now I read a few pages of any book and do any one of the following…fall asleep, turn TV on, check my phone (I know, I know..) or make a snack eat chocolate.

I just cannot read any more. And I cannot take in what little I do. And I REALLY want to be able to. I want to read all of the Game of Thrones books. I watched Life of Pi the other day and thought how much a few years ago I would have loved to read that book.

And it is not just books. I struggle to concentrate on documents at work, finish articles in magazines, take in important info in letters from the school. And I should probably be ‘reading up’ on ways to help my mental health issues..but it’s just not happening.

The problem is I don’t know whether it is something to be worried about. I do worry about it, as that is what I do, but how serious is it and what causes it?

Having the girls and losing ‘me’ time certainly didn’t help. But the girls are older, I am getting sleep and I do have the time (sort of). But the brain fog isn’t lifting.

I wonder if it is a symptom of my mental health challenges. I always have so many thoughts racing around in my head and get distracted easily, so my lack of focus when reading could be an offshoot of that.

Is it my age? I am only 37 but is it a sign of something more sinister to come..like Dementia or Alzheimer’s?

Is it a symptom of a screen addiction or a social media addiction? They are things I could well suffer from…

Is it all of the above?

I just don’t know.

But what I DO know is that I miss getting lost in a good book that you just can’t put down.

One thought on “I miss books…

  1. I know exactly what you mean. I enjoy reading and until recently would read one a fortnight ish. However I couldn’t tell you the name of anything I have read or what happened, I just can’t retain information anymore. This is especially true at work and pretty embarassing at times!

    I am hoping its just simply down to being busy and having to organise 3 extra people plus whatever the latest project is!

Would love to read your thoughts!